Crossing the Abyss

"Real change always starts on the inside."

Have you made the decision to change?

Yes. Most definitely.

What are your reasons for making the decision to change?

I'm tired of just living day to day the way that I am. I need stimulation and daily activity and goals to set and achieve. I'm in a rut. And I need to get out of it.

When you look at yourself, do you honestly like what you see?

No, I don't. I've always struggled with my weight and have a pretty tumultuous relationship with my reflection. I've known for quite some time now that I'm overweight. But I haven't done anything about it. This makes me feel disappointed in myself. And somewhat angry that I've let myself go...again.

How do you feel deep down inside?

I feel as though I've squandered all of my potential. I remember when I lost weight in high school and I had the time of my life. I had a lot of friends, I was at the top of my class, I looked good (although I'm not sure I even fully appreciated it then), my whole life was in front of me. Now, almost ten years later, I'm realizing that the clock is ticking away and I'm no longer taking advantage of all the opportunities and blessings that have been given to me. I have always struggled with my self-confidence in the past and it's something I want to get over. In order to feel confident about myself, I need to be healthy.

How do you really feel about yourself?

I realize that I've actually accomplished quite a bit in my life...but I've never really felt comfortable in my own skin. It's a change I need to make. I'm proud of myself for what I've done. But I deserve so much more. I know this deep down inside. I'm just not sure why there's a disconnect between thinking it and doing something to achieve it.

Are you confident, energetic, and strong?

No, no, and no. Going to work, sitting at a desk all day, coming home, and sitting on the couch for the evening is not living. Sadly, that is pretty much my daily routine.

Do you often wonder if you're on the right path?

All the time. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do with my life. I know I still have a lot of potential but I'm scared of taking chances and uncomfortable with change. I need to get a grip.

What are the pros and cons of continuing in the direction you're going?

The pros: it's easy and I know what to expect. The cons: my life is unfulfilling and will remain static unless I do something about it. Oh - and I also have an increased risk of heart disease, diabetes, and a myriad of other maladies if I don't start to take my health seriously.

Would you like to create a brighter future?

I would love to! I'm ready.

Essentially, my reasons for making the decision to change are:

1. To prove to myself that I am worth it.
2. To make life more fulfilling.
3. To increase my health and live longer.
4. To feel confident and comfortable in my body for the first time.